How does Mother's Day make you feel? Self-congratulatory? A little smug? So happy and content you could burst?

On the contrary, it makes me feel somewhat melancholy and a trifle guilty. Actually really, truly guilty. And because it's such a curious contrast as to how the Smalls want me to feel, I had better try and explain myself.

Firstly, Mother's Day reminds me of how brilliant my mother is. Sometimes I wonder if she is just too daunting an act to follow. Motherhood (along with marriage) is the hardest job we've ever signed up for. It feels like a continual hike up a very steep mountain, with very few bit pit stops. I STILL ask my mother a million questions a week. And this makes me feel sad. What will I do when I can't consult my mother the oracle any longer? I'll be so lost...

This brings me to my second melancholy thought. More than 4 of my besties are already unable to ask their mother how to descale their iron, get rid of a child's hacking cough or take those small people off their hands for an hour of peace. And I feel so SO sad for them. I almost wish I could share my mother with them to make it fairer.

Before I cause mothers up and down the country to fling themselves on the floor in a pool of tears, I do have one more miserable thought. All those thank you messages and I love you cards bring out the great guilt. Am I a good enough mother really? Couldn't I be less short with them? Listen to their detailed stories with undivided attention?

I suppose the bottom line is that it's our day, Mums. They want (and need) to thank us. It's just that it's sometimes hard to stomach.