Friday, 07 October 2016

Honeymoon blues

The 'honeymoon period' in marriage lasts for 13 months and seven days, according to new research

Getting too comfortable around each other, the initial excitement wearing off and knowing each other better are the main reasons the honeymoon period doesn't last in modern relationships. Three in 10 blame "sheer laziness" as a romance killer but before women raise their eyebrows – they're more likely than men to stop making an effort. A survey, conducted by market researchers OnePoll has quizzed 2,000 married British couples on the highs and lows of matrimony and not bothering to look good for our partner, bickering more often and a dip in our sex lives were voted the biggest tell-tale signs the honeymoon is over.

The study also showed that we become more honest about the things that we don't want to do any more such as refusing to visit restaurants our partners prefer or sitting through films we find boring just to please.

If this is all sounding a bit familiar then don't worry it's not all doom and gloom – seven in 10 believe the spark can be rekindled after the initial burn-out. Listening to each other more was voted the best way to reignite the magic, followed by a romantic holiday and more date nights. OnePoll spokesman Kevin Smith said: "It's not uncommon for the initial excitement for newlyweds to wear off after some time. "People shouldn't feel disheartened when the initial buzz of being married wears off. It's more uncommon for the honeymoon period to last forever."

Feeling more settled, knowing our partners more intimately and not having to look perfect 24/7 were voted the best perks of the inevitable. Being more comfortable to talk about our problems was also a firm favourite. But taking each other for granted, being annoyed by their irritating habits and feeling less excited to see our partners are the top lows of the honeymoon being over. Kevin Smith added: "Romance is out there for all of us to rekindle, we just have to take the jump and grasp it back.

In some cases relationships are better once the honeymoon is over – we can finally be ourselves and not have to worry about pleasing someone else 24/7".

Top Ten Reasons the Honeymoon Ends
1. Become more comfortable with each other
2. Get to know each other better
3. Newlywed excitement wears off
4. Become lazy
5. Start taking each other for granted
6. Stop looking good for each other
7. Distracted by other life events
8. Stop making an effort to surprise our partner
9. Have sex less frequently
10. Let bad habits show

Top Ten Signs the Honeymoon Is Over
1. Don't worry about looking good for your partner
2. Start bickering
3. Have sex less frequently
4. Become more honest about not wanting to do things your spouse likes
5. Stop kissing each other goodbye in the mornings
6. Breaking wind/burping in front of each other
7. Stop ending phone calls with 'I love you'
8. You can tell each other when you're not feeling great
9. Going to bed at different times
10. Excitement of seeing each other wears off

How do you keep the spark alive? Let us know on Twitter @theladymagazine using the hashtag #LadyNews

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