Friday, 18 May 2012

Coco's corner: 18 May

Written by Coco
Dear Readers,

I realise I have inadvertently left you on a pulse-pounding cliffhanger. It concerns the Mates's new puppy, the Ginkgo substitute (not that any dog could be as stupid, greedy, incontinent and endearing as Ginkgo, who was, and always shall be, irreplaceable).

I was shocked to hear that the Mates family thought they could incorporate a new puppy into their busy life at Bark Place, with their intensive tennis and bridge schedule, because of the following reason. They were going to 'split' the as yet unborn Buddy with another family, also resident in the appropriately named Bark Place.

At first I thought they were going to slice him in twain, like in the opening scene of The Bridge, the Danish cop series the Dawnays are glued to. The opening episode is most unpleasant. A lady is found on the bridge that links Sweden and Denmark. She is dead. Then they find it is not one lady, but two. The torso is Swedish, and everything below the waist is Danish.

Then I realised that they were not planning to do any sort of section, but a puppy share. 'If we have to go away, the Banks down the road will have him,' Mrs Mates said.

So the next time they were playing tennis, which is the other thing women who live in Notting Hill do all the time, the ed in chief asked how it was all going with the puppyshare planning. 'When's Buddy arriving?' she asked.

'He's called Baxter and he's arrived!' Mrs Mates said with a happy look.

'BAXTER?' said the ed in chief. 'But when the puppy was in utero he was Buddy.'

'Do keep up,' said Mrs Mates.


Office Dog

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